Sleep, or lack thereof

34 days left of school!

Oh I slept so horribly last night! One thing I have been lacking these days is good sleep. It's hard for me to go to bed while things are still happening around me, and Josh does not turn in early, so I have accepted the fact that I'm only going to get about 6 or 7 hours of sleep a night. For some that might seem adequate, but I think my job might just wear me out more than other jobs would. Or, it could just be that I need more sleep than the average person. I read a long time ago that every person needs their own amount of sleep each night--some might need 6 while others have to have 10 to function properly. It also said that people can't do anything to change this about themselves. Sometimes it changes with age, but everyone has their own needs regardless. That saddened me at the time because even then I felt like I was never rested enough, yet I hated to sleep. I'm still not a big fan. There's just too much to do and not enough hours in the day!

The weather yesterday was really amazing and of course I was in school all day. When I got home, I planned to grab Lulu and head down to Green Lake for some fun in the sun. I was just unmotivated when I got home, though. I was truly exhausted. Today, wouldn't you know, is overcast, although still fairly warm. I had planned to hike with Sharonne, but she ended up having to work. It's all for the best, really, because I am still pretty exhausted after a miserable night's sleep. My dreams kept waking me up, too. First, I dreamt I was driving on Hwy 2 to Oregon (which is not a way to get to Oregon whatsoever) and was driving right next to a charter bus that my friend Sharon was sitting on. She and her husband are taking a trip around the world starting next week and somehow this charter bus on Hwy 2 (to Oregon) was part of this trip of theirs. I was all happy I got to be on the first leg of it in a way. :) I know why I dreamt that. I am soooo jealous of her plans for the next year. Seriously. They will be gone for more than a year just traveling! They'll do a bunch of cities in the US, then fly to Europe, then go to Morocco and Egypt, then to Israel. In the winter they will be back in the US to visit family in Florida and go to her brother's wedding, then go to countries in Africa and to Australia. After that, New Zealand and then back home to San Francisco. They are not hitting some of the places I really want to go to like Iceland and Japan and India and South American countries, but they got the rest of them covered! Very inspirational. They have both saved much more money than I could with my expense to income ratio, and way more than Josh could with being still early in the stage of starting/running his business, so it isn't a feasible adventure for us. But it's a nice thought! I would settle for a trip to my parents' place in Brazil or one of the places I've never been like Iceland or Australia. Actually, I would even settle for Vegas. Nothing exotic necessary.

I also dreamt about a guy breaking in to our house and me being too tired to run from him. I hate running dreams. I never have proper use of my legs. It's anxiety-inducing.

I am going to talk to the naturopath about my poor sleep habits when I see her later this month. I have a lot of hormone issues I've been trying to figure out for nearly 10 years to no avail. I've seen people and done extensive tests, but no one has ever been able to really help. I believe more in the ability of naturopaths to diagnose and treat me from the inside out so I am hopeful she'll address my concerns with success. I'm more motivated to try this now because I want to know if I'll be able to have a baby in the future. At this point, I'm fairly certain I can't. So I need to find out what, if anything, can change in my life to help alter that before I'm too old to do anything about it.

Tonight Josh and I are going to Chris's for a crockpot dinner party. I never use mine, even though I was so motivated to get one and try it out. They are awarding a prize to the best recipe, so I feel like I have to do something good. I don't care about winning and don't believe I will be able to compete with some of the people attending, but I also don't want to be embarassed by making something inedible! I found a chocolate PB cake online that I can make. Even if it's horrible, it's still chocolate, so that should sway opinions of it, right?! We shall see....